You Are Not for Everybody — Exercises & tools

Passions and skills exercise

Who Are You?

Also known as write down your passions

• Ch 1Write down your passions and notice how each one makes you feel. Passions are a compass; you can only thrive and grow when you’re passionate.
• Ch 1J.D.’s trick for spotting a passion: like falling in love, it’s measured by how much real estate it takes up in your mind.
• Ch 1Next to each passion, write a skill that can make it real, such as “I love to travel and can edit a 30-second video about my experience in an hour.”
• Ch 1Then ask: Who are you? “Don’t fall in love with the idea of being something. Fall in love with the journey that will get you there.”

Four-act structure

Understanding Narrative

Also known as four acts

• Ch 3J.D. writes his novels in four acts to pace the story, understand each character’s motives and reward readers.
• Ch 3Act One sets up the world and ends with an inciting incident, a turning point that changes the character’s life forever. Act Two brings conflict up to an epic midpoint.
• Ch 3Act Three is failure: the heroes are tired and there seems no way out. Act Four is “the crowning jewel,” where he connects the dots, keeps some mystery and delivers what he promised.
• Ch 3He then translates it for business. See Four acts for your brand.

Four acts for your brand

Understanding Narrative

Also known as brand four acts, the crown, inciting incident

• Ch 3Act One: meet your audience where they are with something they want to change; reveal existing demand or create an inciting incident that produces it.
• Ch 3Act Two: while the audience wonders what’s in it for them, you act, offering pieces of information that spur them to action.
• Ch 3Act Three belongs to the audience, who see how they’ll keep failing without your product, like feeling left out of the music everyone’s talking about.
• Ch 3Act Four: the audience is the hero and wins a crown, which is your product. Now you must deliver, or the hero turns villain.

Three questions before posting

Branding via Association

Also known as three things

• Ch 6Before making something public, ask: 1) Is this an investment in people’s perception of my brand? 2) If people agree, how will it resonate with me in the future? 3) How will haters react?
• Ch 6“Feelings are not excuses.” Don’t share just because you feel like it; intentionality is your best friend.

Emotional hooks exercise

The Emotional Hook

• Ch 13On the left, list your emotional hooks, such as immigrant or minority. On the right, describe the audience each could reach. J.D.’s sample: undocumented immigrant, for aspiring entrepreneurs with no papers.
• Ch 13It’s meant as a confidence boost, using struggles as strategy. “Cheers to the broken parts in us, folks!”

Read the room

Friends, Connections, and Growth Partners

• Ch 17At a networking event, go talk to the person by the cheese station; that’s why they’re there. At a talk, look for a bridge such as an assistant or social media manager. Never be abrasive.
• Ch 17Before approaching, think about how you can contribute to their journey.

Opening with your story

Friends, Connections, and Growth Partners

Also known as meaningful sentence

• Ch 17People who catch J.D.’s attention bring their story, like the writer who’s queried agents for five years and asks, “What now?” Start with a meaningful sentence.
• Ch 17Openers that went nowhere: asking how much he made to buy something, “I want to be rich. Got any tips?”, or trading a famous father’s name for free design.
• Ch 17If you’re divorced and the person built a business after divorce, be honest about that. It’s an emotional hook.

Three marketing steps

Understanding Marketing

Also known as audience research, solve the problem, campaign goals

• Ch 4Audience research: identify your target audience. How much will they pay, where do they shop, and how will they find your product?
• Ch 4Solve the problem: people get anxious when you name a problem they have, so use narrative to present it inspirationally, not aggressively, unlike the shampoo ad that could have said “Horrible hair? Wash it with X shampoo.”
• Ch 4Goals: set clear, specific goals for each campaign, whether awareness, sales or loyalty. The more specific the goal, the clearer the message.